Watching the people on teevee watch themselves

It was a kind of a meta night, with three people (me, and the stars of “JUNKies” :[horrible horrible name, or genius cross-marketing with soon-to-be-signed-methadone advertisers? Time will tell] Doyle in the “red” coverall [he is so huge he causes visible light to redshift due to his gravitational pull, making him look human-sized and the coverall look red], and next to him “Fire” I think is what she went by) who were all on teevee, but none of us own a teevee. I am sure that says something about something, but they just hire me for my looks (yeah. I know. We are talking really low budgets here). Many other skilled builders and potential future stars of basic cable were in attendance, about half of them visible in the below photo, all at the home of Super Awesome Nerd Queen Becky Stern, who made fancy cupcake toppers with her CNC vinyl cutter. She also  took the photo.

I  had not seen even a rough cut before this viewing, and anxiousness at possible revenge from the editors I never bothered learning the names of and treated rudely, at best, quickly evaporated. While I think the show felt a little rushed, and tons and tons of good stuff -rants, science, at least one whole build- did not make the cut (I hate and fear hobos, and had some great hobo jokes and rants, but the network ordered them all cut. Why? As not to offend hobos.Yes- you cannot alleviate that valuable, informed demographic of syphilis-ridden, teevee-less boxcar dwellers, who only get a new bindle when they shiv the previous owner as they sleep off a Sterno binge. Yeah. Don’t piss them off, or they will boycott the car companies advertising on the show and steal more cooling pies from the windowsills of America. I think the show should be an hour long. I also think I am a genius, but the people in the room with me also liked the show, and they are people who know me well enough to feel no need to blow smoke up my ass, people who would have eagerly mocked me if they thought the show sucked. If you liked it, make a comment. If you saw some serious flaws or have a question, let me know. Your criticisms might well be ignored or even derided, but that sort of interaction and user-generated content is supposed to matter in the world of today, so I will pretend to care.

Also: You should watch next week’s episode. It was fun to make, and involves improvised projectile weapons, power sporks, fire, one sweaty dude moving a huge thing by himself, and a possible answer to the problem of post-apocalyptic laundry.

Laundromat of the Gods
8/25 at 10:30PM e/p
Hackett is stuck in a place where modern technology comes to die: the junkyard. For Hackett, it’s the mother lode of obtainium. The only downside is that it’s also the world’s dirtiest place, it’s filled with a strange type of goo — a mixture of hemorrhaged engine gas bleeding from rusty tanks and the dust of 1,000 rotting cars — and it leaks all over his clothes. Since there is no way Hackett will pay thousands of dollars for an industrial washer/dryer, he sets out to make one. Hackett finds an old American clunker — this is the base structure for his washer and dryer system. To complete the transformation from car to washer/dryer, Hackett must build a welder from scratch, reinvent the spin cycle, and turn the exhaust fumes of a car into the heat he needs to dry his clothes.